вот. сегодня на обеде накатал.
если кто тут хорошо в английском шарит, подскажите, что не так - а то я собрался на улице эту песню зачитать.

If you just allow I’ll try to explain how
I can live this life and be happy no matter what happens now.
Jesus is my Lord and His ruling word
In my life cuts everything useless like a sword.

My father was not a preacher still he was a good man.
He tried to teach me how to live and seemed to make it well.
Now thanks for those years, mom when I was a child
When you just had so much patience, and if not you tried hard.

My granny and granddad died but I remember you,
You were not only good people but you had the truth.
I could see you two even so many years passed,
You were so loving not pretending and you were always just.

I can say there were people, who were good and bad,
People who made me laugh and people who made me being sad.
The ones who stole my money and ones, who gave me so much,
But you know thank you all that you gave me some touch.

I had to move in my life to get to know God,
I realize I was a sinner and had a corrupted heart,
Some of you guys revealed my true mentality.
Though sometimes I thought it was only of your insanity.
*******
I thank God He made me avoid some nasty things,
He seized me out of hell, even I was so disgusting.
My words were always filled with pride and lies,
I didn’t want to think that usually every man dies.

Trying to find the truth I messed myself with all kinds of dirt,
Trying to fix my life I desperately sought for resort.
Trying to solve that puzzle what was I here for?
Still no glimpse of light found and no open door.

Jesus said one can be strong even he is so young.
Even them say you are too small you need just to have fun.
Don’t listen to them, man, you got to have your own brain!
Listen to God saying He wants to take away your pain.

Millions of people seem to be born-again,
Though not all of them trying hard, or want to do the same
As Jesus did when He was denying Himself.
You know the truth now and the others may need your help.

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made me being sad

энто чейто както не так

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I thank God He made me avoid some nasty things, He seized me out of hell, even I was so disgusting.

это тоже

ХотСтоун......это нечестно.........а если кто дупля не кидает в анг. а ну ка кидай перевод........всего этого....или это ты на иных языках начала вещать? :-)

ну да, я согласен - в первой фразе я изменю на MADE ME SAD.

а вторая вроде нормально, вот только запятые щас поставлю:
I thank God, He made me avoid some nasty things, He seized me out of hell, even I was so disgusting

even - это типа though, только очень по-разговорному. в документах такой формы, конечно, не увидишь...

Дип, извини, на русском это не так интересно выйдет

Но могу перевод на струнах давида или в приват скинуть...

ну че такое even я знаю.. я про рифму в том месте

а...
я люблю просто такие вставки.

заметь - не типа "ведро - мурло". но тут вроде как звучит ритмично...

как зачитаю, посмотрю - если очень плохо, изменю слова... сейчас чего-то ничего не придумывается.

спасибо за комментарий.

может так?
I thank God, He made me avoid some nasty things,
He seized me out of hell, even though I was outrageous

кинь мне на мыло
[email protected]

мне понравилось- ошибок значительных нету и интересно было читать

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Цитата от S-Kit :
может так?
I thank God, He made me avoid some nasty things,
He seized me out of hell, even though I was outrageous

попробую... тогда надо будет в этом месте сделать паузу или бит заглушить. будет как бомба.